This weeks episode is a personal favourite of mine, not because of the content, the discussions are always comedic gold. But because it's the first time that I've smoked weed before a show and we haven't had to restart the pod 18 times, which takes about two hours (yes, seriously two hours), so then burn out and have to smoke again. And of course, the process repeats until we agree to just record the next morning.
Today's episode was not one of those.
We start off trying to remember a joke we said earlier that we can't remember, which is unfortunate because it was really funny. Then we get into our 'Of the Weeks' including "that answers the age old question moment of the week' where we come across a story about a man who used glue instead of a condom and died. There's also "who are you trying to impress moment of the week" where an Idaho man broke the world record for balancing the most toilet paper rolls on his head.
We then get into our Backpage News where we find the weirdest headlines in the news and discuss them. Starting with 'There's a loose kangaroo in Lebanon County PA, Whose is it?. Now obviously it's super illegal to have a pet kangaroo in Pennsylvania so no one has come forward to report the large animal. So John and I believe somewhere in Lebanon County there's some guy or group of people in a basement scheming up a plan to retrieve their pet kangaroo without anyone noticing.
Now just in case that person or group of people are reading this, I'll tell you what my plan would be. Personally, I think you gotta add another kangaroo to the mix. The only way out of this is to add fuel to fire, you order another kangaroo from your kangaroo guy, one of the opposite sex, and use it as a lure to attract the initial kangaroo. You are welcome.
Up next, we got a story with the headline "TikTok doctor explains why sneakers filled with human feet keep washing up on beaches in the Pacific Northwest". Now this is one of those rare headlines where we find ourselves disgusted yet intrigued at the same time, kind of like looking at roadkill.
First things first, I absolutely love how there are doctors on TikTok explaining crazy shit like this. If you know me, you know I hate TikTok but it's the new wave and they've already taken over so if you cant beat 'em, join 'em. Most kids are going to be spending hours on the app anyways, may as well start slowly moving our education system on the platform.
Anyways, around a couple dozen human feet have washed up and most people believe this is some sort of mafia hit where they dump the victims body parts in the ocean and now they're starting to turn up on beaches. While others think it's some sociopath serial killer with a foot fetish and their signature move is cutting off feet and dumping them. Which doesn't make sense because if the killer has a foot fetish they would probably want to keep the feet... Just sayin'
The actual reason, as described by the TikTok doctor, professionally known as Dr. Karan Raj, is actually really interesting. He goes on to say;
"When a human corpse falls to the ocean floor, it's quickly set upon by scavengers," Raj said in the video. "These scavengers are lazy feeders and prefer to tackle the softer parts of the body than the tough, grisly bits... When scavengers chow down on this, the foot will detach pretty quickly from the rest of the body".
No jokes here, that's actually pretty cool. Good job TikTok.
Typically we run four news stories but our Fact Guy Colman, aka C-man, forgot to pull up the link so this next one is our last headline in our Backpage News before John and I arm wrestle in todays Sports segment.
What are the odds of this happening? Seriously I want someone to get me a number on that. I've never even heard of a professional snake catcher, but this did happen in an Australian supermarket somewhere in Sydney, so that solves that mystery.
I'm confused as to how a 10 foot snake even finds its way into the spice aisle without anyone noticing. That isn't even the strangest part of the story, how unlucky is this snake that the person it decides to pick on is a trained snake catcher.
Luckily she lived nearby so she could retrieve her snake bag and catch this thing. Anyways this led us to discuss how odd of a career this woman has, which drove us into a conversation about taxidermy where we look at some of the initial works of the craft, take a look in the video above.
I teased earlier that we ended the episode with an arm wrestle, so I'll leave you guys off with that little treat. A little context, the other week in Sports we talked about professional arm wrestling so obviously John and I arm wrestled. Unfortunately for me I lost and being a male I felt the need to call a rematch so I could restore my manhood, so here you go.
Written by: Jacob Racco